INDEX  TO  WEB  SITE

HOME
PREFACE 

STORY UPDATE NEWS AND EBAY LISTING

 

GENERAL ITEMS
FOGGYDAVES CANTENNA 
THE EVIL OVERLORD LIST

THE EVIL MINIONS GUIDE

OTHER EVIL/ HERO  GUIDES
A FEW VERSES 

NAMES I CALL MY WIFE & SHAKESPEAREAN INSULTS

COLLECTIVE NOUNS FOR ANIMAL SPECIES

SOME OTHER EBAY SALES WITH STORIES

THE REAL MEANING OF HAYNES MANUAL INSTRUCTIONS

SALAD FINGERS

TOMTOM SATNAV SAG BLUES

 

KITE MAKING PAGES

REVOLUTION KITE MAKING

 

CONTRIBUTIONS FROM READERS

STORIES BY HATTYMENDER  

STORIES BY HELEN WORRALL

 

STORIES  AND EBAY SALES

1     AN OLD LAND ROVER
2     EBAY
3     SELLING AN OLD LAND ROVER  
4     SELLING WHEELS AND TYRES
5     A NEW JOB AT THE FUNERAL PARLOUR
6     SELLING VIDEO CAMERA
7     MY BIRTHDAY TODAY
8     WITCHERY PART ONE
9     SELLING CANVAS HOOD
10   WITCHERY PART TWO
11   SELLING CARAVAN HITCHDRIVE 
12   WITCHERY PART THREE
13   SELLING RATCHET STRAPS  
14   WITCHERY PART FOUR
15   SELLING GOAL POSTS  
16   WITCHERY PART FIVE
17   SELLING A HI VIZ COAT
18   WITCHERY PART SIX

19   SELLING 3 TONNES OF CLAY    
2O  WITCHERY PART SEVEN
21   SELLING A WHEEL CLAMP
22   SHOPPING AND THE HESITANT DOORS
23   SELLING AN OLD PAIR OF BOOTS

24   THE REAL DE VINCI CODE

25   MY GUITAR AND AMP

26   SELLING MOTORBIKE PANNIERS

27   HALLOWEEN

28 SELLING A HIGHWAY CODE

29 ZEN AND THE ART OF  LAND ROVER MAINTENANCE

30  SELLING A CIGARETTE LIGHTER AND A TRIP TO SCOTLAND

31  CHRISTMAS LIGHT RAGE

32  METAMORPHOSIS

33 SELLING AN AMBER BEACON

34 THE UNIVERSE IS A  BIG PLACE

35 SELLING A  BLOW LAMP

36 SELLING BOOTS UPDATE

37 SELLING A  TORCH

38 SELLING A MOTORBIKE JACKET

39 SELLING A POWER JUICER

40 SELLING A HORSE WHIP

41 THE BOAT

42 SELLING LAND ROVER SIDE STEPS

43 SELLING A  TOW / RECOVERY CHAIN

44 SELLING LAND ROVER BULL BARS

45 SELLING THE FOGGYDAVE CARRIER BAG

46 CARAVAN RAGE OR AGINCOURT DEUXIEME PARTIE

 

 

 

REVOLUTION KITES

And other types

My kiting hobby

My second attempt at making a kite

My Kite Gallery

Making a Revolution kite. Page still under construction

Bridle dimensions for a Revolution SLE and B series kite

Line sleeving and equalising. Page still under construction

MY STORY

The trials and tribulations of retirement

I retired from a life of hard and not so hard work this year. I have enjoyed most of the jobs I have had over the years from engineering to lorry driving from being a lunatic motorbike courier to a more sedate window cleaner. I have even tried writing humorous stories. I have never been without a job of some sort.

The problem with retirement is that full time occupation ceases and time takes over, lots of time, a never ending path of minutes, hours and days waiting to be filled. This presents us with somewhat of a dilemma for  retirement gives you time to relax when you do not have time to relax and take that time. This is because at the age of 65 you realise, and have done for quite a few years now, that you are mortal, you are nearer the grave than the cradle, much nearer. I am as my grandchildren would say, a crumbly, a coffin dodger. The few years left cannot be wasted, they must be filled with an urgency to make every minute count, for there is little time  left. (Approximately 5 years according to the Bible).

Depressing isn't it?

There is another even greater problem with retirement. In the months leading up to my 65th birthday the wife started mentioning all the little jobs that needed doing. In the past this would have elicited the standard response "When I have time my love" But now I have time and the list of little jobs has now turned into War and Peace.**

"You said you wanted to fill your time" she said "Just think of me as a facilitator."  she said.

And now we come to the reason for my kite hobby. The BIG problem with retirement.  Most of my spare time has been devoted to hobbies and past times that have kept me in either a shed or a garage, two places considered foreign soil by my wife, places of greasy motor parts, dust and spiders. But now I would be expected to spend more 'quality' time with the wife. Not a pleasant prospect as I had spent most of my life trying to avoid her and her idea of 'quality time' is not mine. I needed something to keep me out of the house and the final choice came down to either a dog or a kite and as I could never pick up dog poo in my plastic covered hand  I decided a kite would be the more hygienic choice.  

I will update this page with pictures of kites I have made as and when I make them. 

                     

 

** These jobs consist in the main of little jobs to finish off the big jobs that were not completed in the past. Like a foot of skirting board in the kitchen that was not put in because I had run out of material and it was not worth buying a long length to finish it off. All the temporary fixes that had over time become permanent were on the list. The loose shelf, the slightly angled wall mounted television. (When we sit down our heads automatically tilt to the right) All these jobs have been festering in her mind for these past years, for as with most wives they accept these temporary fixes as a 'man' thing for as we so often hear when eavesdropping onto a female conversation. "He never finishes anything"

 

 

 

TO TOP